I get up against the pain. They look at me with sympathy or mocking. I get up against their mocking. I get up against their sympathy. There are words on the mirror and smoke in my eyes. The room shakes and my legs threaten to give way again but I stand my ground. They look at me with hatred and fear. I stand against their hatred. I turn from their fear. They want to see me fall but I'm already on the ground.
The bench is loose under my feet and I rock it back and forth as I wait for her to show up. I've been sitting on this picnic table for what seems like forever and I think I'll only wait a few more years. Isn't it worth the wait to bite into ripe fruit and not the green buds that only make you sick. I made a promise to be waiting on this bench and I plan on keeping all my promises. Did she mean to make me wait so long? Is she late or am I early? The air is warm and their are kids playing in the jungle gyms. It's quiet in the shade where I wait for someone I can honestly say that I love. I can prove that I love her because I have waited three years just to hold her hand and to see her again.
My pocketwatch stopped ticking today and it stopped tocking yesterday. It's just a pretty circle on a length of chain. Is it useless now that it doesn't tell the time? I pull it out of my coat pocket anyway. It makes me feel comfortable to thumb it open and look at the face. A quarter past one and the sun is setting.
I give up! The phone rings. "Hello?" I shouldn't have answered. She told me all the things I wanted to hear and then never called me again. "Goodbye?"
Tick!
The theme of the prom had something to do with stars. I was on the planning committee, but for the life of me I didn't know why there were hundreds of cardboard stars covered in glitter. They hung from the ceiling and stood up along the floor. The lights were low and the music was loud. It wasn't my prom but I was there to pick up stars that fell down. The stars formed a path for you to walk into the room and past the tables onto the dance floor. It really made it easy to make an entrance, as much as cardboard and glitter will facilitate an entrance. Instead of taking the path, most people decided to walk haphazardly into the field of stars knocking them down or crushing them in the process. It was my job to pick up the fallen and the crushed.
I met her at an arcade and thought she was very pretty. She was also too young but I would make the exception for her if I could. I met her again and I knew she was too young but I wanted to ask her out anyway. She left to go smoke before I could. I met her again and she told me that she was getting married. She told me that she loved me. I love her. She told me to leave.
Tock!
The old man walked across the roof tops as the last rays of the sun disappeared between the buildings on the skyline. He wore a fine suit that hung loosely over his grizzled frame. He was not just skin and bones but the suit looked like it was tailored for a man a head taller and with broad shoulders. The sleeves of the suit were folded back to reveal muscled forearms and the pants rolled up to reveal bare feet. Wind whipped through his long grey hair as he stared down at the cars rolling down beneath him. Very few people remained outside. Stiff winds and freezing temperatures stood guard outside their doors. He was looking for something. Something he would never see coming.
Tick!
I found the kitten in the shrubs outside out house and it was dead. Mewing pitifully as I tried to comfort it. A dog had bitten in it's head and it didn't move right. It would never live in the condition that it was in. I cradled it until my dad took it to the vet. The vet charged forty bucks to do what nature was going to do for free. What nature had us all doing. Marching towards a conclusion an ending.
We lay on the ground. Folded into each other's arms. For a moment I was completely happy. I knew that someone loved me and I loved her. The sky was a blanket of clouds with a bright moon shining down on us. The night was a cool relief from the hot summer days. We kissed for a moment and I tasted the cigarette on her mouth. Her lips were still paradise to me. We lay next to the park bench with the broken seat. This would be the place we should meet if anything happened to keep us apart.
Tock!
Turning from the world below the old man heard it creeping up behind him. "Not today!" He thought as he ran across the rooftop. His bare feet kicked up dirt and dropping s as his legs carried him faster and faster across the roof. The edge came close and he didn't slow his speed. He pushed himself harder than before and leapt. The bells of a nearby church began ringing sadly mournfully. He fell with his arms out to each side and his long grey hair following in a fiery white trail. His enemy hissed from the rooftops. Cursing the old man's name.
Tick!
I ran from the flames that shot into my back. I screamed as they rolled down me and burnt my skin. It wasn't fire but boiling water. I screamed my hatred of the world as I got lost in the pain. My back was on fire with blisters as I fought off the very people that wanted to help me. "I hate you!" I screamed over and over again.
I was almost home as I was talking to her on the phone. The cell was dying and the reception was horrible. I could strangle that guy off the Verizon commercials. I pulled off to the side of the road to find a place where I could hear her and she could hear me. She wanted me to come over for a minute and I said that I would. I drove back and cuddled up next to her. Beautiful in my arms. Then she kissed me. My heart broke when she kissed me and I fell completely in love with her. It was a clumsy and awkward kiss. Our lips barely touched like lips should but it was a kiss I would remember forever.
Tock!
Until Death chases me down.
